"this world is not my home"

here i stand,

'free fall'

the rock she built her dreams on
the child he hoped to see aspire
to fight the against the veil
that was drawn over her eyes
to hide her passion, her thirst for justice.

the child grows everyday
and everyday it thirsts to know
which way is right to know which way to go.
there isn't a corner left to hide in,
as time starts to fly in,
all the alarms start ringing,
its the airpatrol,
black the windows out,
snuff the candles,
go to sleep cold and shivering.
unable to decide which breath to take and when.

what do you do with the power of awareness?
it is not to recognise the trouble you're in,
it is not enough to admit your feelings.
"It is not because men's desires are strong
that they act ill; it is because their consciences are weak."

will i come to you even with the storm raging on?
will i walk blindly towards you over the water?
i feel like i'm drowning already,
irony,
the boat that I want to do the rescue?
I got the colour painted, the size mapped out,
I got the dimensions and the crew.

yet, here i stand,
on the bottom of the sea floor.
i'm staring up and i don't know whether i'm supposed to fight the depths to surface
or whether i'm just down here, chain and ball,

mama, am i supposed to escape this?
or am i supposed to push through?
i keep making these mistakes,
its the only way i've ever learned.

when everything is changing,
what do i hold onto?


i'm trying to figure it out.